Five Tools to Use with Depression (part 2)
07/10/19 Filed in: Depression
Setting Goals. This is helpful in getting you moving forward through the mud of depression. I often encourage people to find the right personal balance in setting goals. You don't want them so big that they are unattainable on your best day, but you also don't want them to be so small that you don't get any benefit from accomplishing them. Your goal might be to get out of bed by 10:00am. It might be too organise a dresser drawer. It might be to read this entire post. It might be to take a walk or a bike ride. It might be something bigger that requires several steps before the goal is reached. The key is to have some target that feels you are making some sort of progress for the day.
Changing Thinking. When depression hits, we tend to get into a cycle of "stinkin' thinkin'". We want to feel better, but our thinking tends to get in the way. For example, you might say, "I know I should get out and take a walk, but I don't feel like it." If I heard someone say that, I would suggest two changes to the thought processes. First, what happens if you change "should" too "would like to"? It kind of takes the pressure of guilt off, doesn't it. Guilt is NEVER a good motivator! Second, do the Double But. We tend to run to the first but when we're not feeling good. Trying to stop the first but is, in my opinion, wasted energy. So I say, go ahead and think the first but…but don't stop there. Double-but the but. "I would like to get out and take a walk, but I don't feel like it. BUT I can at least put my shoes on." That second but moves you forward and makes the next step a bit easier. Whatever but you stop on holds the power. Give the second but that boost.
Relaxation. Do some deep breathing. Soak in a tub. Listen to the birds. Do what helps you relax. Sometimes depression gets stronger when we are trying to do too much and we don't have time to recharge. Give yourself space and permission to relax.
Activity. Endorphins. Even non-medical people have heard about these nice little natural wonder guys. They're your body's chemicals that make you feel better when you are active. And they're just itching to get to work, but they need you to do some kind of activity to warm them up and get them flowing. It doesn't have to be a hard one-hour workout at the gym. It can be a gentle walk, a slow bike ride, a wander through the gardens. Just do some kind of activity that lets your endorphins know they can get busy.
Problem Solving. Working through some sort of problem, no matter how small it is, can help you see progress. Problems often feel like the black cloud hanging over you, or something ominous just out of eyesight. Writing a simple plan, carrying out one step at a time, making progress towards the removal of that cloud can often help you move toward the shallower end of the depression mud pool.
Now again, just as a reminder, please don't try to use all five of these at the same time. Two at the most. And if you find those two aren't working, then experiment with some of the others.
And as always, if you want to work through the depression you are experiencing with someone, please feel free to contact me. I am more than willing to walk with you through this part of your life journey.